Book Review: I kissed Dating Goodbye

As the mother of 4 girls-3 of whom are in or near dating age-, I want a resource I can use to discuss dating and courtship.  I jumped at the chance to request I kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris.

From the Publisher: Joshua Harris's first book, written when he was only 21, turned the Christian singles scene upside down...and people are still talking. More than 800,000 copies later, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, with its inspiring call to sincere love, real purity, and purposeful singleness, remains the benchmark for books on Christian dating. Now, for the first time since its release, the national #1 bestseller has been expanded with new content and updated for new readers. Honest and practical, it challenges cultural assumptions about relationships and provides solid, biblical alternatives to society's norm.

From the Back Cover:

Tired of the game? Kiss dating goodbye.
Going out? Been dumped? Waiting for a call that doesn’t come? Have you tasted pain in dating, drifted through one romance or, possibly, several of them?

Ever wondered, Isn’t there a better way?

I Kissed Dating Goodbye shows what it means to entrust your love life to God. Joshua Harris shares his story of giving up dating and discovering that God has something even better—a life of sincere love, true purity, and purposeful singleness.

As I read the book, I found myself nodding.  Though I have not been “single” for over 19 years (2 years of being a couple + 17 years of marriage), I do remember when I was single.  My thoughts and views on dating were very similar to Joshua’s but unlike him, my views didn’t spring from a Christian perspective.  At least not consciously.  And I dated.  I just had a “rule” that if I couldn’t see myself married to the person, I didn’t accept a second date.  Well, most of the time that worked.  There were a few exceptions here and there. I think I would have greatly benefitted from reading I Kissed Dating Goodbye.

The book is divided into four parts: “Isn’t there a better way”, “The Heart of the Matter”, “Building a New Lifestyle”, and “Looking Ahead”.   Parts 1 and 2 spoke to me about my past and helped me to better understand what I couldn’t explain to my friends then. Joshua put into words some of the thoughts and feelings I had but he went further and backed it up with a Christian perspective.  He explains why dating is a set up for failure.

Parts 3 & 4 are not applicable to me personally at this time since I am married after all Smile.  But these parts are the heart of what I want for my daughters.  I’ll be making sure that they read this book and that we take the time to discuss it.  Especially the part on page 115 about making your parents your teammates.

Joshua writes from the heart and shares his struggles.  He isn’t perfect.  He hasn’t figured it all out yet.  But he doesn’t claim to have it all figured out.  He keeps it real.

I highly recommend this book!

Disclaimer: I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group in exchange for this  honest review.


  1. I have been wanting my older boys to go through this book...thanks for the reminder and confirming that it is a worthwhile read. I felt almost the same thing ( He isn’t perfect. He hasn’t figured it all out yet.)about DO HARD THINGS by two other Harris boys...the read was very teen in the level of writing, but REAL and spurring other teens to reach higher...
    Gregg Harris was the one who really helped us anchor our convictions about fun to see his boys writing


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